26.2 miles? To run or not to run...

So on a cold, wet, december night, I am contemplating the possibility of attempting the Belfast Marathon, on May Bank Holiday Monday 2012.   A number of conflicting thoughts arise...

On one hand, I have completed this marathon before, not once, but twice now, in 2010 and 2011.  Both times, I have promised myself never to undertake this challenge again, and twice during training last year I had this same thought.  I believed that doing it once was an achievement, and to suffer the distance during that, and then to attempt it again in 2011, took an amount of courage and stupidity in equal measure.  I was able to improve upon my time by over 10 minutes, while not getting close to the 4 hour mark I had hoped to dip below.

On the other hand, I found the training to be beneficial to me in many ways; the obvious fitness gains, weight losses and added focus and sharpness I gained just generally, along with enhanced sleeping patterns.  I have often felt at my healthiest during this period of the past two years, and seem to be driven by the goal of the marathon day at the end of the training.  At various points I have found the training tough and almost regretted my desicion to undertake the challenge, but my overwhelming memory of the past two marathons, has been crossing the finish line and having a huge sense of achievement, as well as extreme fatigue and pain, in equal measure.  The long, arduous days of training were all worth it, and forgotten about when the medal is around my neck.

Finishing in 2011

I think this memory and feeling is what has me debating with myself if I have the time, energy, motivation, desire and above all, the general ability to try this again.  

Before I can decide, I have to ask myself the questions;

- Can I go faster than last year?

- Do I have the time to devote to the training?

- Do I have the motivation to get out the door and train 5 days a week, for 16 weeks?

To be continued...